Walking the Walk by Tom Bliss and Alexandra Katehakis

step 12 Magazine Tom Bliss

Our constitutional freedoms of expression give us the right literally to take to the streets—to demonstrate—when some concern moves us passionately. When we walk the walk, we get on our feet and prove our desire to make change happen by showing people around us that we mean business. Similarly, when you’re recovering from an addiction, you have to take concrete, visible actions to earn back the trust of friends and family members. And when you’re living in a love relationship you also have to actively participate in the relationship. How many times have we heard the phrase, “walk the walk” and taken it for granted? Love isn’t just what we say, love is what we do.

For example, cooking a meal for someone is an act of love—an outpouring of creativity, talent and energy that takes time and effort. A delicious meal is the physical manifestation of the cook’s heart, a way of physically showing how much you mean to him or her. Your appreciation might be expressed by sensuous moans as you savor the tastes, texture, and symphony of the delicious morsels. Your verbal demonstrations reflect your own gratitude that someone went to the trouble to give to you so generously.

Ravenously devouring your lover clearly demonstrates your desire to merge, to create a mystical third, and to reach Nirvana. But on a daily basis, demonstrations of love can come in the most mundane acts like appearing at your lover’s bedside with a morning cup of coffee or tea, or running an errand because you know they can’t tend to it. Every demonstration counts. Don’t get lazy or take your partner for granted, walk your walk.

Daily Healthy Sex Acts

• Demonstrate your love for someone today with a small gesture.

• Demonstrate without getting brownie points: do something nice anonymously for a co-worker, neighbor, or other friendly acquaintance.

• Make a grand display for your partner to show you’re sincerely connected—have fun with it!